Why You Feel So Stuck in Life (And How to Fix It)
You're not stuck in life because life is unfair. You're stuck in life because of you.
It's your choices, your lack of discipline, your habits, your mindset—and this is why you keep going in circles.
You make some progress, then you fall off the wagon, and before you know it, you're back at square one.
Here's the thing: If you don't fix the things I'm going to talk about in today's letter, you're going to wake up five years from now in the exact same spot—feeling miserable, broke, and full of regret.
I'm speaking from personal experience. I'm 42 (turning 43 this year), and I know the mistakes I made in my 20s and 30s, as well as the lessons I'm still learning in my 40s.
I get it—you might be making some progress or maybe you've fallen off a couple of times, and it feels like you're going in circles. Nothing you do seems to help your life progress to where you think you should be at your age.
By the end of this letter, I'm going to explain exactly what is holding you back and how to solve your problems so you can start winning at life instead of running around in circles.
If you're feeling stuck, you're not alone.
Most people hit a point in life where nothing seems to change—maybe you're not making more money, your love life hasn't taken off as expected, or your career is stagnant.
The reason most people feel and remain stuck is that they don't do anything about it. If you don't fix the things I'm about to discuss, you'll end up with a life full of regret.
Regret, when left unchecked, will eat at you.
It's like a slow cancer that tears away all of your hopes, dreams, and motivation.
You have to let go of that regret—because if you don't fix your life, if you don't address these issues, you'll keep going in circles, not knowing what to do.
Think about it like this: you're traveling in your car with Google Maps on your phone, trying to reach a destination. At some point, the map directs you to a small, obscure alley, but you keep missing it because there are no clear markers.
That's how life is—it gives you signs and constant feedback on what's working and what's not.
But if you’re not open-minded and aware, you'll miss those signs and keep repeating the same mistakes.
A big part of this problem is that you allow self-doubt to keep you playing small ball—you’re not willing to take risks or go all in on yourself.
For example, imagine you work at a company with plenty of opportunities for upward mobility.
There's a perfect opening for that dream job—the one that pays more, lets you be creative, and offers leadership opportunities.
Yet, you won't apply because self-doubt tells you you're not good enough or that someone else has more experience.
Then, a month later, when they announce the new position and someone like Jeff gets the job, you’re left wondering why you missed your chance.
You keep watching other people win while you stay stuck.
That dream job—or the extra $20,000 to $30,000 per year—could change your life, not just financially but by offering new challenges, skills, and the chance to work with a new team.
The same goes for personal goals, like sticking to a gym routine. If you let self-doubt win, you'll never see the progress that others do.
Let's get into the main topic: the things you need to fix. We already know it's about mindset, but there are deeper layers. So, let's talk about how to solve this problem of feeling stuck in life.
1) You're Addicted to Comfort.
Deep down, you choose comfort over discomfort because, as humans, we naturally seek ease.
But growth doesn’t happen in comfort. Consider David Goggins—whether you agree with his message or not, he gets up every morning, even when it's cold, wet, or dark, because he knows discomfort builds his mindset.
Even though he admits he’d rather stay in bed, he pushes through for the sake of his mental strength.
Yet, many of us watch motivational videos without taking any action. You can't just watch and expect change.
If you're not willing to step out of your comfort zone, your body and mind will never adapt and grow. Think of the person who laces up and runs in the cold versus someone who stays in bed just because it's comfortable.
The one who endures discomfort will get stronger and see progress.
Sometimes, even after enjoying a period of comfort—like a relaxing 7-day Mexico cruise—you need to shake off that comfort and refocus on your goals.
Waiting for the perfect moment means you'll always be waiting.
Today is February 2nd, and the New Year 2025 has already begun. There is no perfect moment; you have to start now.
Whether it's running, going to the gym, or creating content, you start winning the moment you take action.
If you tell yourself you'll wait until you have more money or until your friend returns from vacation, you'll always be behind. Instead, take action now, build momentum, and let your body and mind adapt to new challenges.
2) You’re Surrounded by the Wrong People
Another critical point is your environment. Look at your friends and your social circle.
Are they supporting your growth, or are they holding you back?
Not all your friends need to be entrepreneurs or content creators—some are simply good people who support you.
But if certain friends consistently bring you down, consider reducing the time you spend with them.
Your environment plays a huge role in your outcomes.
Research on behavioral health shows that the social determinants of health—your family, friends, and community—significantly impact your success.
Social Ecological Model
If you grow up or live in a negative environment, it can hinder your progress. Your future self is largely determined by the five people you spend the most time with. If their goals, achievements, and dreams don't align with yours, you might need to make a drastic change.
Some people resist changing their social circle, but if you're stuck in a loop of regret and unfulfilled potential, it might be necessary to distance yourself from those who hold you back.
3) You’re Not Taking Ownership
Finally, take full ownership of your actions. Stop blaming external factors—the economy, politics, or anyone else—and hold yourself accountable.
Whether it's not eating right, not working out, or lacking confidence, the responsibility lies with you.
Every self-development video out there points to one thing: everything starts in the mind.
You must envision a better future to create it.
To summarize, here are some quick action items:
Embrace Discomfort: If you're struggling to get up in the morning, set your alarm an hour earlier and use that time to exercise, read, journal, or learn something new.
Take Immediate Action: Don’t wait for the perfect moment. Take one small step every day toward your goals.
Evaluate Your Circle: Identify any negative influences in your life and reduce the time you spend with them.
Take Ownership: Write down one excuse you've been telling yourself, then replace it with an actionable plan. For example, change "I don't know how to make a YouTube video" to "I will make my first YouTube video," then do the research and take action.
If you enjoyed this letter, share it with a friend. Also, check out my other content and resources.
Thanks for reading.
Jovon