How to Build Discipline in 3 Ways (Harsh Truth for Men)
If you're waiting for motivation to change your life, then you’ve already lost.
Motivation is temporary. The key you need in your life is discipline.
But here's the thing: most people don't know how to build it.
It's 2025, and you started the year off pretty good. You're in the gym, maybe doing your runs in the morning; you even started taking cold ice baths.
Maybe you want to learn skills for online business to be an entrepreneur, or you're finally starting that YouTube channel.
For a couple of weeks, you're doing really well, but then one weekend you wake up and something happens—you lose all motivation and no longer want to do those things.
I promise, if you keep reading this letter, I'll teach you how to create bulletproof discipline in your life—even doing things when you don't want to do them.
Yes, it is possible to create discipline in your life with work.
1) You Rely Too Much on Feelings
Most people don't reach their goals because they rely on the "feel like it" mentality: "I will go to the gym when I feel like it, I will eat better when I feel like it, I will make that YouTube video when I feel like it."
That "feel like it" approach holds people back.
Speaking from personal experience, the "feel like it" is what separates those who accomplish more from those who remain stuck in a constant loop of regret or confusion—the people who feel like doing it versus the people who do it.
When you say, "I will go to the gym when I feel like it, I will eat better when I feel like it, I will make that YouTube video when I feel like it," you're wasting time—wasting years.
Imagine a battery depleting every day.
From the minute you're born, there's a timer counting down, and when you keep waiting for that "I feel like it" moment, it might come five or ten years down the line—or it may never come.
You don't want to be the person who starts something but never finishes it.
Life is busy.
Things are always happening, life changes, and you may never get back to that project because life throws you curveballs. That "feel like it" mindset builds self-doubt, regret, frustration, and a lack of clarity.
Meanwhile, the people who take action—those who say, "I'm doing it now"—are further ahead.
Winners do it today, while those who say, "I'll do it later" end up stuck.
Later might be five years from now, and by then you could forget that you were going to start that YouTube channel, learn those skills, or achieve that ideal body. The people at the top have discipline; those at the bottom lack it.
Maybe you make a little progress when you're motivated, but then you lose that motivation and drop back down.
It's about progress over time—little steps that separate winners from those stuck in a loop.
Think of a Tesla Model X versus a BMW M3: the Tesla might blast off quickly, but in a longer race it may hit a point where it can't go further, and the BMW catches up.
You cannot come out blazing every time—you'll burn out. That's motivation; discipline lasts over time.
Relying on feelings—saying "when I feel like it"—won't get you there.
Using that mindset wastes time. Life is busy and always changing. You might start something and then never finish it because you always wait for the right moment.
2) You Have No Systems in Place
In his book Atomic Habits, James Clear explains that building habits comes from having systems.
A regular routine helps maintain discipline.
For example, I wake up every day between 5:00 and 5:30, go to the gym from about 5:30 to 8:00, then work from 8:00 to 5:00 Monday through Friday.
In the evenings, I use my free time for Jiu-Jitsu training, scripting, or creating video content. On weekends, my routine might change slightly, but my weekdays remain consistent.
Even something as simple as keeping your gym bag, shoes, and water bottle by the door saves time and prevents excuses. Use a system—like a Google Calendar—to schedule your days.
When you create systems in your life, you’re able to become more efficient, allow your systems to work for you, and build discipline through consistency in your routines, daily life, and planning into the future.
Third, make discipline non-negotiable. Treat your commitments like a business. Instead of saying, "I'll work on my YouTube channel when I feel like it," say, "I will work on my YouTube channel today." Replace "I will try to work out tomorrow" with "I will work out tomorrow at 7:00 a.m." That shift in language triggers your mind and sets your actions in motion.
3) You Make Discipline an Option
When people talk about motivation, they say you need it to start things—whether it's YouTube, business, or improving your health.
But motivation is temporary. Discipline takes you to the finish line.
When it comes to building bulletproof discipline, it cannot be an option. It must be a part of your daily life as a requirement.
One of the best ways to build discipline is to take immediate action.
For example, when you get up in the morning, grab your bag, leave the house, and get to the gym.
Or turn on the camera, switch on the lights, and start making your YouTube video before your mind plants seeds of doubt.
Consider another analogy. Think of someone who sprints out of the gate in a 400-meter race. They might burst out quickly, but eventually they burn out.
In contrast, a long-distance runner paces themselves and eventually overtakes the sprinter. This is the difference between relying on motivation and building discipline.
If you push yourself in bursts with motivation, you may burn out. But if you cultivate discipline, you maintain a steady pace toward your goals.
Discipline isn’t seen as an option. It must be a requirement or a level you work towards in your life.
Shifting your mindset can make a world of difference. Instead of saying, "I will try to go to the gym," say, "I will go to the gym."
That small change empowers you and sets a clear expectation for action.
To build bulletproof discipline, focus on three key areas:
rely on discipline over feelings
establish systems,
making discipline a non-negotiable commitment.
When you consistently apply these principles, you create a life where discipline carries you through even when motivation fades.
4) Discipline is Built through Consistency (And Self-Talk)
Imagine if every day, without fail, you performed the actions that push you closer to your goals.
It's the small, consistent actions that add up over time. It’s also the consistent self-talk that helps you create discipline.
That’s why it’s so important to shift your self-talk to be positive (resist the negative self-talk).
Replace "I will try" with "I will."
This change in language has a powerful impact on your mindset and actions. When you affirm, "I will go to the gym," you set a commitment that is harder to break.
Your words shape your reality, and by choosing language that implies certainty, you build discipline.
Most people forget that your self-talk will keep you stuck in life because of the seeds of doubt you plant into your mind. Don’t allow yourself to talk you out of greatness.
I hope this letter resonated with you. See you next time.
Jovon